Excerpts From Various Web Publications
Compassionate Detachment ~ Being an Old Soul in a Young Soul World ~ To Thine Own Self Be True ~ The 4Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom ~ The Age of Reason ~ The Seven Principles of Hermetic Law
Compassionate Detachment
By Gabriella Kortsch Ph.D.
www.wellsphere.com
A friend recently told me about some deep troubles. This wasn't even a client. It was a friend, and yet, I remained within a mindset that some (especially Buddhists) call compassionate detachment.
Compassionate detachment might be defined as the manner in which we relate to others when we allow them to deal with their own problems and they are therefore free to choose to become responsible for their own issues, while simultaneously we express a loving concern for the nature of their current predicament, and also simultaneously we are not invested in the outcome (this definition is the compilation of numerous definitions of the expression found on the web).
The operative words here are that we remain detached enough so that we do not step in to attempt to resolve their problem, their pain, their issue for them.
It does not mean we care less for them. It does not mean they - and the outcome - are not important to us.
On the contrary, it means we care so much, that we deliberately step back - much like the anxious parent observing a baby take its first tottering steps will also step back in order to let the baby manage on its own - so that the other person will come to that point where they decide to resolve for themselves.
Clearly - just as in the case of the baby, where we are on the lookout for sharp table corners or dangerous steps, where the baby might hit his head or fall down - we are also lovingly present to help the individual with a problem or an issue.
But not to rescue.
When we get into rescue mode, we are generally working for our own agenda:
We may need to feel in control
We may need to feel strong and invincible
We may need to get the payback of the other person's gratitude for what we did
We may need to get the payback of allowing ourselves to feel good about ourselves because of what we did (because without it, we find it hard or impossible to feel good about ourselves)
So as rescuer, we are generally not working so much on the other person's issue, as on our own...
Another reason to be compassionately detached is to realize that some persons leach our very life energy out of us ... in their need to discuss their problems, and in their need to be listened to ... over and over and over again ... they become energy vampires. You will know very quickly when you are with someone like that, because you will feel weak in some fashion after spending some time with them.
So what does that mean?
You are not compassionately detached. You have very poor boundaries because you are willing to listen to something so draining over and over again telling yourself that you are being a good friend, or wife or husband, or mother, etc., while in fact you are enabling the other person's sense of helplessness or of being a victim of life or circumstances.
You are a much better friend, a much better partner, parent or child, and also - a much better therapist, counselor, healer - if you remain compassionately detached, and in that fashion promote self-responsibility and autonomy of action in the other individual.
Being an Old Soul in a Young Soul World
If you're reading this, you're probably an Old Soul. Infant Souls are in jail for being serial killers; Baby Souls are busy attending Bible class or Ku Klux Klan rallies; Young Souls are off chasing the Almighty Dollar so they can park a shiny new BMW in their driveway for all the neighbors to see; and Mature Souls are flitting between their shrinks and the Betty Ford clinic. Only Old Souls sense that there's more to life, and are trying to figure it out so that they can get off the incarnation carousel. However, as the chart shows, we're in the minority.
So, Old Soul, you live on a planet where the average soul age is late Young … and can't you tell? You know about living by the Golden Rule and honoring the Four Agreements, and you smile at the games played by the younger soul ages, for you were there once. You know that it's all Maya, or illusion, so you march to your own drum, rarely getting steamed up about causes. You are good at almost anything you do but may choose to do nothing, which, by the way, really puzzles the younger soul ages. And our work and hobbies are usually oriented to personal growth, teaching, writing or bringing beauty of some sort into the world.
Rigid schedules, a classy house or a new car are low on our list, even though we could have them because we know the secret-using the laws of creation, programming the M-field, etc., rather than plain, hard work.
The problem is that, in a Young Soul world, we're not appreciated because the younger souls don't understand who we are or what we have. Oh, we "get" them fully, of course ("been there, done that"), but they don't get us. So, when we judge ourselves by Yuppie values, we fall short. We don't fit the Madison Avenue image of success, so beating ourselves up comes easily. In fact, low self-esteem is a major Old Soul problem because we've lost the brashness and arrogance of the earlier soul ages.
According to the Michael Entity channeled through Emily Baumbach, Baby Soul organizations include most government agencies, the Ku Klux Klan, the National Rifle Association, and groups such as Rotary Clubs. Most of Corporate America is Young Soul, while ecological groups such as Greenpeace and the Sierra Club are Mature Soul. We Old Souls are just too laid back to even want to organize anything.
Another reason is that we see the big picture and realize how truly tiny is our role in it. We don't have the Baby Soul's self-importance, the Young Soul's driving ambition to acquire the most toys, or the Mature Soul's fascination with his own dramas. No, we see things as they are, and can't get puffed up with our own self-importance. It's not that we don't care. In fact, we are the most caring soul age, as witnessed by Old Soul peace activists Sting, Jerry Garcia, John Lennon and Yoko Ono.
For their own purposes, different soul ages favor certain countries. Aboriginal populations tend to be Infant Souls, such as those in Australia, Borneo, Ethiopia, the Amazon Basin, and the Sudan. Baby Souls tend to incarnate in Latin countries such as Argentina, Brazil, Haiti, and Central and South America in general. Baby Souls also predominate in China, India, Indonesia, in Muslim countries such as Iran, Iraq, Libya and much of the Middle East, and in African countries such as Ghana, the Ivory Coast, Liberia and Nigeria.
Young Souls pop up where science and economies are hot, such as Australia, Canada, some European countries, Hong Kong, Israel, Japan, Mexico, Taiwan, South Korea, and Vietnam, plus progressive Arab states such as Oman and Saudi Arabia. Some areas of the U.S. are comfortable for Young Souls, such as California, especially LA and Silicon Valley, although the rest of the U.S. is shifting from Young to Mature.
Mature Souls favor countries that have the basics handled and are exploring sociological issues, such as Belgium, Denmark, England, Finland, Greece, Holland, Italy, New Zealand, Norway, Russia, Sweden and most of the United States.
That leaves few areas that Old Souls enjoy, such as Iceland, Switzerland, and some pockets in the U.S., such as Oregon, Washington and northern California, and in spiritual enclaves such as Santa Fe, Taos, Sedona, Atlanta, the Florida Keys and Boulder, Colorado.
Our challenge is that we live in a world defined predominantly by Baby, Young, and Mature Souls. Because Baby Souls need rules & regulations, structures, direction, "authorities" and frameworks within which to live, they create them and impose them on everyone. If they think having a nude beach is disgusting and perverted, they figure it should be disgusting and perverted for everyone, so rather than just leave us alone and not go there, they ban it. Or they get the Young Soul lawmakers to ban it, who will because they're sporting the latest Gucci swimwear and don't need a nude beach.
Likewise, Old Souls see nothing wrong with being gay, but the idea terrifies Baby Souls, who pull out their Bibles and quote scriptures at the poor gays, who just want to be left alone. Their hit list is endless-pot, abortion, euthanasia, smoking. For every freedom, there's a law limiting it, and more laws pour out from the Baby Souls every day. The problem is that Baby Souls are so sure they are right, that they think they're right for us, too.
It's not easy being a Baby Soul, though. No glorious sex out in the open air; it's in the dark with pajamas on. And if the rulebook doesn't cover a situation, they must find an older soul for guidance. Their greatest constraint comes with religion, as witnessed by Baby Souls Jerry Falwell, Oral Roberts and Jimmy Swaggart. (According to the Michael entity, Jim and Tammy Fae Baker are first level Young Souls still operating as Baby Souls.)
Talking of religion, in Europe about 500 years ago, many of us Old Souls were doing Mature Soul intensity and beginning to question the rigid dogma of the Catholic Church. Or maybe, as an Old Soul woman, you lived alone on the edge of a forest with your cat and studied herbal remedies. Either way, it was enough to have the Baby Soul Church come after you … and Baby Soul Priests threw nine million of us into the "flames of purification" because our souls were apparently in mortal danger of eternal damnation, or so they told us. Or did they just enjoy strip-searching young women and girls, shaving their pubic hair, and looking for the "devil's teat"? Nah, they wouldn't do that. Would they?
Also, Baby Souls are compulsive about neatness and germs, not realizing that 100 percent of all illness is neurotic (all in the mind) in origin. But they worship doctors as gods, and sacrifice themselves to the medical industry, losing breasts, prostate glands and ovaries to the knife.
Okay, having pissed off 20 percent of the population, let's turn to Young Souls. Here, the main issues are power, prominence and wealth. Who has the most powerful army, the tallest skyscraper, the biggest diamond, the most gold, the largest oil reserves? And if it's not us, let's go to war so that we can have it. After all, Young Soul Warriors make up the largest population block in the United States (Young = 30% and Warrior = 30%, making for 9%, or 23 million people), exemplified by George W. Bush, a Young Warrior (with Goal = Dominance, Mode = Perseverance, Challenge = Arrogance). Perfect presidential material!
The Young Soul credo of "I win, you lose" has brought us the adversarial legal system, dreadful pollution, gas-guzzling SUVs, and a business management system corrupted into a money-making machine for the few. Talking of corruption, classic Young Souls Ferdinand and Imelda Marcos, late of the Philippines, siphoned billions out of their country, while most of their subjects lived in squalor and poverty.
But again, it's not easy being a Young Soul. They are compulsive about appearances and the trappings of success, so they work long hours to buy the biggest, the best, the fastest, and the most. Also, a strong identification with the physical body brings terror at the first wrinkle or gray hair. Sagging breasts, balding or crows feet are all alarms that send Young Souls to cosmetic surgeons, also Young Souls with a taste for SUVs and BMWs. And the beat goes on.
We have much to thank Mature Souls for. Finally, souls can see and appreciate others' points of view, and don't see others as "the enemy." They bring mature themes in music (Paul McCartney, Janis Joplin, Bruce Springsteen and Madonna), in art (Vincent van Gogh and Paul Gauguin) and in literature (J.D. Salinger and Truman Capote). They also bring us crusaders such as Ralph Nader and Gloria Steinem, not to mention passionate actors such as Elizabeth Taylor, Richard Burton, Kevin Costner, Russel Crowe, and Robert DiNero.
Most notably, Mature Souls are into "rights"-civil rights, gay rights, immigrants' rights, unborn children's rights, animal rights and the rights of any minority without a voice.
But now the nagging questions of "Who am I?" and "Why am I here?" begin to plague the Mature Soul, who doesn't yet have the Old Soul's answers. This brings emotional angst, confusion and pain, which in turn leads to drugs, alcohol and suicide. Sean Penn, Robert Downey Jr., and Woody Allen are living examples of Mature Soul angst. And James Dean, Princess Diana, Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin and Jim Morrison are examples of Mature Souls who would still be with us if their flight plans hadn't called for an early departure.
So, here we Old Souls live within Baby Soul rules, Young Soul greed and competitiveness, and Mature Soul angst, but at least we know what's going on and can make adjustments and allowances for the younger souls.
Now, let's turn the tables. What if we were in charge? What would the world look like if Old Souls ran it? Actually, we wouldn't run it; it would run itself once Old Souls predominate in the population. Normally getting there would take about 50 generations, or 1,500 years, but we don't have that long, for as you'll read in Chapter 12, something will happen in 2012 that will catapult us into that future, ready or not. And the next chapter explores what that society will look like.
To Thine Own Self Be True…..
(February 2, 2000)
Most of us are familiar with the above quote taken from Shakespeare’s Hamlet, but how many of us know this verse: “And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou can not then be false to any man.” Unless we can be true to ourselves first, we cannot be true to others.
To Thine Own Self Be True…..how profound. How many of us have a hard time being true to ourselves? Those of us that gave our life to another at the cost of losing who we are in the process will have a hard time being true to ourselves. Allowing someone else to define who we are, we lose our ability to discover and grow inwardly. We no longer are able to discern a truth from a lie. For many of us, we have accepted lies for so long, that finding out what is true takes time. Having done this very thing, I know how difficult the journey to self-discovery can be.
Truth….truth is a word that brings out such negative reactions to many of us. You see truth is really an action word. You cannot accept truth without change. Accepting truth about ourselves is difficult, especially to those of us who have been abused. But truth does set one free if we will allow it to; it is a crucial part of healing. It gives us the freedom to be who we are. We are able to come to terms with our weakness (without condemnation) and appreciate our strength. Truth gives strength; it naturally builds healthy boundaries. Truth is open; it is honest even at the risk of being vulnerable again. Truth is light and brings forth life. When we walk in truth, we walk in light and when we walk in light we live a healthy life.
Truth is also love. The greatest act of love towards another is living a life that is truthful. For those of us who find it difficult to love ourselves, we will find it will come more easily when we walk in truth about who we are. If we walk in truth, we walk in perfect love, and if we walk in perfect love, then we do not walk in fear because perfect love cast out fear. Because we have been honest with ourselves, we are able to love ourselves with all of our imperfections, knowing that we are in “process” and therefore need not have others approval. This is freedom indeed.
The second part of this verse is a natural occurrence if we hold true to the first part of the verse. So, when in doubt as to our motives of not being truthful with someone….look inside, are we being less than truthful to ourselves?
This above all: to thine ownself be true,
And it must follow, as the night the day,
Thou canst not then be false to any man.”
-Shakespeare-Hamlet
The 4 Agreements
"It is NOT important to me what you think about me, and I don't take what you think personally.... I don’t have the need to be accepted. I don’t have the need to have someone tell me, " Miguel you are GREAT"... What ever YOU think, whatever YOU feel is YOUR problem not MY problem."
"PERSONAL IMPORTANCE or taking things personally, is an expression of SELFISHNESS because we make the assumption that everything is about ME.
NOTHING PEOPLE DO IS BECAUSE OF YOU - IT'S BECAUSE OF THEMSELVES!!"
*******************
“We don't need to know or prove anything. Just to be, to take a risk and enjoy your life, is all that matters. Say no when you want to say no, and yes when you want to say yes. You have the right to be you.”
“The freedom we are looking for is the freedom to be ourselves, to express ourselves.”
“Humans are mentally sick with a disease called fear.”
“Death is not the biggest fear we have; our biggest fear is taking the risk to be alive--the risk to be alive and express what we really are. Just being our self is the biggest fear of humans.”
“Nobody abuses us more than we abuse ourselves.”
“The truth is the most important part of being impeccable with your word...Only the truth will set us free.”
“Nothing other people do is because of you. It is because of themselves.”
“Don't take anything personally.”
“The way to keep yourself from making assumptions is to ask questions.”
“The best way to say, "I love you, God," is to live your life doing your best. The best way to say, "Thank you, God," is by letting go of the past and living in the present moment, right here and now.”
“Impeccability means "without sin." Impeccable comes from the Latin pecatus, which means "sin." The im in impeccable means "without," so impeccable means "without sin." Religion talks about sin and sinners, but let's understand what it really means to sin. A sin is anything that you do which goes against yourself.”
"Everything is made of light"
"Everything is God"
"The real us is pure love, pure light"
"Attention is the ability we have to discriminate and to focus only on that which we want to perceive."
"The only way to store information is by agreement"
"The belief system is like a Book of Law that rules our mind"
"Our biggest fear is taking the risk to be alive"
"Humans punish themselves endlessly for not being what they believe they should be."
"We have the need to be accepted and to be loved by others, but we cannot accept and love ourselves."
"Your word is the power that you have to create"
"A sin is anything you do which goes against yourself"
"You go against yourself when you judge or blame yourself for anything"
"When you are impeccable, you take responsibility for your actions, but you do not judge or blame yourself."
"Your opinion is nothing but your point of view"
"Personal importance, or taking things personally, is the maximum expression of selfishness because we make the assumption that everything is about me."
"Nothing other people do is because of you. It is because of themselves"
"The whole world can gossip about you, and if you don't take it personally you are immune."
"You can choose to follow your heart always"
"The problem with making assumptions is that we believe they are the truth"
"We only see what we want to see and hear what we want to hear"
"We make the assumption that everyone sees life the way we do"
"Real love is accepting other people the way they are without trying to change them"
"Doing your best is taking the action because you love it, not because you're expecting a reward"
"If we like what we do, if we always do our best, then we are really enjoying life. We are having fun, we don't get bored, we don't have frustrations."
"When you do your best you learn to accept yourself"
"Your own body is a manifestation of God, and if you honor your body everything will change for you"
"Your life is the manifestation of your dream; it is an art. You can change your life anytime if you aren't enjoying the dream."
"Our brain is the factory of the emotions"
"We are addicted to being the way we are"
"Forgiveness is the only way to heal"
"The truth is like a scalpel. The truth is painful"
"The dream you are living is your creation. It is your perception of reality that you can change at any time"
"Only love has the ability to put you in that state of bliss"
"The only reason you suffer is because you choose to suffer"
The only reason you are happy is because you choose to be happy. Happiness is a choice, and so is suffering
The Age of Reason
Thomas Paine
"I believe in one God, and no more; and I hope for happiness beyond this life.
But, lest it should be supposed that I believe many other things in addition to these, I shall, in the progress of this work, declare the things I do not believe, and my reasons for not believing them.
I do not believe in the creed professed by the Jewish Church, by the Roman Church, by the Greek Church, by the Turkish Church, by the Protestant Church, nor by any church that I know of. My own mind is my own church.
All national institutions of churches, whether Jewish, Christian or Turkish, appear to me no other than human inventions, set up to terrify and enslave mankind, and monopolize power and profit.
I do not mean by this declaration to condemn those who believe otherwise; they have the same right to their belief as I have to mine. But it is necessary to the happiness of man that he be mentally faithful to himself. Infidelity does not consist in believing, or in disbelieving; it consists in professing to believe what he does not believe."
